Just for youknowwhats and giggles I have decided to post a Hot Topic. I've been reading other blogs floating around out there with more of an edgy, made -ya- think sort of twist to them and thought I'd give it a try. That, and, Bonnie requested more posts (hey, us Moms at home need to stick together).
The topic for today: Spanking.
I did not hand pick this topic out of the air, it actually came up in a conversation with a Mom/Friend of mine this week.
To sort of switch it up I will refrain from posting my opinion on the issue until I hear what others have to say.
What I will do, though, is post the stance that the AAP has on the issue.
It is as follows:
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that if punishment is needed, alternatives to spanking should be used.
Although most Americans were spanked as children, we now know that it has several important side effects.
It may seem to work at the moment, but it is no more effective in changing behavior than a time-out.
Spanking increases children's aggression and anger instead of teaching responsibility.
Parents may intend to stay calm but often do not, and regret their actions later.
Because most parents do not want to spank, they are less likely to be consistent.
Spanking makes other consequences less effective, such as those used at child care or school. Gradually, even spanking loses its impact.
Spanking can lead to physical struggles and even escalate to the point of harming the child.
Children who continue to be spanked are more likely to be depressed, use alcohol, have more anger, hit their own children, approve of and hit their spouses, and engage in crime and violence as adults.
These results make sense since spanking teaches the child that causing others pain is justified to control them—even with those they love.
What is your personal rule on the spanking issue? Were you spanked as a child? Do you spank your children? Why or why not?
Are you O.K. with other people spanking their children? Do you not believe in spanking but are fine with other physical type punishments?
Discuss.
4 comments:
I will start....since Brady is sleeping and I have two hands to type!
1. Yes I was spanked as a child. As a matter of fact, I remember my dad spanking me a few times b/c of issues at dinnertime such as whining, etc. (This is an issue in our house right now).
2. I have spanked. It is a last ditch effort. Is my temper frayed when I have? Yes...should it be? No.
3. Did it work? With Ryan-not really.
Kate--rarely have had to if ever
Olivia--not really
Ryan told me the first time I did it that it didn't hurt. As a matter of fact he taunted me with it! Now, when Thad has done it, it seems to be more effective.
I tend to be a swatter. In other words, I might do it once. When I was a kid, it was a production. It fricken hurt too!
A friend who I teach with and I have discussed how kids today are much brattier, feel entitled, etc. (Not so much little kids, but older ones) We agree that kids don't fear their parents and the consequences that they will get like we did as kids. Were we better, more respectful, and just followed the basic rules of the house? I think maybe so...
This got long. Hallelluja for two hands!
I did NOT get spanked as a child. Was I a brat? Hell yeah! My parents did well though. They kept me in line in other ways. My brother and I turned out to be really great human beings.
Spanking is a parenting choice, which personally, is NOT a choice for us. Every-single-time my kids have pushed me, I have been ANGRY, very angry. It isn't right to disipline them aka spanking when you are that angry. Spanking is to let out your OWN frustrations as a parent. It does NOT benefit the child. Think about it, are you cool and calm when you have been at the point of spanking? There are more efficent ways to "teach." Don't get me worng, I am strict and stern with my children and they know, but I am also loving, too. They don't need to learn that their mommy and daddy thinks it is okay to hit b/c that is what we believe spanking is.
I worked in schools, and plain and simple, kids are more disrespectful b/c parents don't know or even care how to teach their child those manners in their household. They know abuse is wrong, but don't know other ways to teach them. You will hear a "please" and "thank you" from my kids. I am not perfect, but I strive to learn everyday and do my best.
Ha-ha, AJ, you wanted it and you knew I couldn't resist to give it straight. lol
I would agree--and am ashamed to admit it--that spanking can be a weak choice on my part.
Disclaimer: this is not a judgment on other parents but on my own personal opinion:
we hit children
to show children
that hitting children is wrong.
Doesn't make too much sense to me.
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