I'm going to go crazy. So help me God, it's true.
Three kids and I can barely keep from losing my mind. How do those (you) Moms do it with 4,5,6 + kids?!?
I suppose I should be more specific. It's not the "regular" stuff like dinner and laundry and baths and what not - I actually enjoy that part. It's the screaming and fighting and tantrums and crying and not listening and talking back and whining that gets me.
I have been trying for 6 1/2 years to not let that stuff bother me. I so badly want to be one of those Moms who keeps her cool and is able to diffuse the situation with a hug and kind and gentle words. Not only is that not exactly natural for me, but it really doesn't seem to work with my kids anyway.
Take last night for example: BOTH Laila and Delaney were melting down because they wanted a bag of chips that they saw on the counter at dance class. Laney goes in to this high pitched crying/whining and Laila follows suit with louder and LOUDER requests as we're walking out the door. I'm carrying the bag of shoes and all CeCe's costumes (it was dress rehearsal) and Laila decided to go boneless and throw herself on the floor.
Boom: I'm angry.
Without saying a word I scoop Laila up under my arm and haul her out like a bag of dog food all while she is going in to her blood curdling scream mode. Laney is still trying to cry and whine at me, which I can barely even hear over the screaming, people are looking around to see if a child has just cut their finger off or something and then quickly realize it's just Laila and then their gaze turns to pity on me.
We get to the car and I tell the big girls through clenched jaw to get in their carseats so I can wrestle Laila in to hers. She is still screaming and it is so loud it actually hurts my ears - seriously, just ask Bill. I get her in and come around to buckle Laney and she's still trying to cry at me over the bag of chips. So help me.
I get in the front seat, turn the car on, turn up the radio and attempt to ignore it. I can't. I turn around and tell EVERYONE TO JUST STOP SCREAMING AND LOOK OUT THE WINDOW!
Wow. What a great example. It's no wonder my kids are the way they are.
There's got to be a way to diffuse some of these situations before they get to that point, but I feel like by the time I figure it all out my kids are going to be moving out and attending regular therapy sessions because their mother couldn't get a grip.
Of course, by the end of the night it was all forgotten. The kids were playing kitchen in the porch and Bill and I were their customers and Cecelia was showing us all her things she got to bring home from her last day of school.
.....but then it was time for bed......
4 comments:
Dude, it is like this in all homes. I swear if you were to go to each home and open their front door you are going to find the same scenario, wrapped with the same guilt, and same situational drama. I swear you pray for babies, you wish them to get older because of all of the above, and then there will be us begging them to come back and hang out with their old crotchety mothers and PLEASE bring your babies. Then we will be sitting there with screaming grandchildren drinking Bloody Mary's and loving it. Why life works that way I am not sure...it is a volatile, cruel cycle. But we will be the mothers that support each other and love each other through it. Because you are an amazing mother and the bes-test friend ever!!! xoxox
I agree AJ. We all feel like if there was a camera in our house documenting stuff, we would be in trouble...if not with the law then with society.
We all lose our cool. And like you said, the kids forget it...you are a GREAT mom!
I am so glad that you are so honest because not enough people are and it can make crazy mothers (like I) feel even more crazy. I LOVE the way Melissa put it, I just love Melissa!
Every child is different and figuring out how to diffuse every situation and specifically in such a way for each kid is exhausting! Scream once in awhile, we need it! Your girls are wonderful and a joy to be around, so you can't be that bad (you are an awesome mom!!) Love you!
Have you been eavesdropping on me? Seriously, I SO get it. I want to be the same kind of parent I was as a teacher, but it's so much easier to be patient with other people's children than with my own. It's nice to know you go through it, too.
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