Thank you to all of you that took the time to help a Mom out with your comments and suggestions - they validated my feelings.
I did speak with the director who then spoke with the teacher who then spoke with me!
Basically, the teacher said that they do not have group time-outs very often but she does have them lay on their backs for a minute before transitioning from the climber room in to the regular classroom. This is the same thing she does for time-outs so the kids are easily confused. She said that this classroom is particularly wild because of 13 very physical boys (who apparently are out of control). Also, she said that she threatens group time-outs more than she actually uses them.
When I spoke with the director afterwords I told her that I am still uncomfortable with the group time-outs for this age group. She said she did go over some different strategies with the teacher so I'm hoping that the group "punishment" stays at a minimum if at all.
Lastly, before hanging up with the director she told me a "story" about her own daughter's experience in kindergarten and how she was told by that teacher not to be an overreacting parent. Hmm....wonder if there was an underlying message there for me!
Thanks everyone!
9 comments:
See, I told you, you did the right thing! It is better to be involved and speak up with things like that then to let other people take care of your child in such a way or do things to your child that you are not comfortable with.
Being involved in your child's future is essential. I have seen children in the system where parents aren't invovled, and it is sad. The children have NO respect and are horrible. Your girls are wonderful and are going to be wonderful because you are a GREAT mom. A GREAT MOM! Love ya, dear!
Can I just state my opinion... As a parent with a child just beginning her education you are not being over reactive. To be told by a teacher or better yet a Director not to be an over reactive parent is offensive. Even if it was an underlying message. Do you really care about her experience with her daughter? Your phone call to her was about your daughter and your gut feelings about what is happening. Emily's kindergarten teacher and principal continually praise dave and I for voicing our concerns. I have even mentioned that i may be a little too intense at times and they have told us that they welcome that over the parents that don't care. As you can tell, I am feeling a little passionate today. Go with your gut girl!
That's too bad that now you have been made to feel like they think you are overreacting. Like I said, when I told our director, she felt that was out of line. I don't see lying on their backs as doing anything. Just a simple, "let's take 15 seconds to quiet down" might be a decent transition.
You did the right thing, and you should not let whatever was said make you feel badly.
I was wondering, did you ask this complain to remain anonymous or not? Since the teacher spoke with you I was interested to know...
I did not specifically ask the Director to keep my name out of things and the teacher knew it was me because she spoke with me right at drop off time.
The teacher was (I feel) back peddling her way out of the situation by explaining it away in her response of saying "we lay on our backs to calm down" and "some boys in this class are very physical and need help transitioning" and "I threaten a group time out more than I use it"
The Director did tell me that she went over some helpful strategies with the teacher so we shall see.
If you were in my shoes what would ya'll do?? CeCe loves school so I don't want to yank her out and I feel that my voice has been heard. Should I just wait it out?
Can I just say that cracks me up how she ended with a story about being an overreactive parent?
To me, we are our children's best advocates, we need to ask and seek out information to make sure things are happening in their best interests. I don't think what you did was "overreacting" in the least. Now if you're calling the school daily and micromanaging (which you're not) that's another thing.
Hope things get straightened out!
"Trust me when I tell you I'm on my girls. And everytime I am, I know from the outside it looks like I'm an overbearing, controlling parent. But I don't think we are responsible to anybody but our kids and ourselves" -Brooke Shields
I love that Brooke Shields quote. WOW!
I don't think you were over-reacting at all and it was offensive for the teacher to slip that in there.
I also think the fact that she "threatens the kids with time-outs more than she uses them," is probably part of the problem.
Hope it all gets worked out!
Holly
I'm really behind in my blog reading, so this response is rather delayed. But I have a LOT to say about this since I prepare preschool and elementary teachers for a living. I'm not sure exactly where to begin...
First, preschools do indeed have to follow teacher-child ratios. The ratios set by the state may be slightly different from the ratios recommended by the NAEYC (National Association for the Education of Young Children). I don't remember how old Cecilia is, but the minimum staff:child ratio in MN for preschoolers is 1:10 with a maximum group size of 20. If Cece is in a mixed-age group, that ratio may be lower if there are younger children involved. Here's a link to the ratios recommended by the NAEYC:
http://www.naeyc.org/accreditation/naeyc_accred/draft_standards/defs/groupsize.html
Second, I have never, ever heard of a teacher having all the children lie on their backs--either as a time out or a transition. Without knowing extenuating circumstances, this would generally be considered developmentally inappropriate. Time-outs are not generally advocated in early childhood education, and certainly group timeouts are not typical or appropriate. There are many ways to manage active children, including multiple opportunities for active play and gross motor movement, guiding and redirecting children when they demonstrate "mistaken" behavior, and establishing a classroom environment and daily routine that allows for individual and small group time (not just whole group experiences).
Third, teachers, directors, and principals who truly value families believe in establishing ongoing partnerships with parents and always welcome comments, questions, or concerns. You were right to raise your concerns and you did so in a professional manner. At this point, it's a wait and see situation. If you give it time and you still have concerns, it makes perfect sense to seek out an alternative.
You are your children's best advocate.
Post a Comment